where is ishida?

is it just me or was ishida totally erased from the bleach manga? i mean he's been gone for more than 20 chapters already (i think), and i'm starting to suffer from the lack of uryuu exposure.

naruto is like blah with me right now. sure there's a new character, but the plot is still stagnant. SHOW UP SASUKE SO WE ALL KNOW WHETHER WE WANT TO HATE YOU OR NOT!!!

will update drabbles... sometime. i think. furuba is my only saving grace these days.

dreams and friends

i woke up from a dream this morning with something like dread in the pit of my stomach.

i dreamt that i had a sword, and that i had killed people with that sword. one day i had to come face to face with this guy, and kill him like the rest of the guys i've met. the problem was that he was better than me, and even as i tried my hardest to slice him up to pieces, i always felt like i was the one losing and dying. somehow that certain encounter ended, and we were ordered to kill each other at another time. i remember crying before our second fight, because i knew that i was going to die and that i couldn't stop it, and i was chopped liver as far as i was concerned, and it felt horrible as hell.

thank god i woke up after that, but the feeling is still there, in my stomach, squeezing my insides.

i think a friend is going to backstab me.

bleach drabbles

drabbles. done out of boredom so nobody should ever take them seriously. *lol*

Drabble 1 : My Father's Daughter
Characters : Nemu, Mayuri
Words : 329
A/N : People question Nemu's parentage
1 : My Father's DaughterCollapse )

Drabble 2 : Everyday Horrors
Characters : Kenpachi+Unohana, Ikkaku, Yachiru, Yumichika
Words : 277
A/N : Ikkaku thought he's seen it all.
2 : Everyday HorrorsCollapse )

Drabble 3 : Stupid Bastard
Characters : Renji+Rukia
Words : 177
A/N : Renji is dense.
3 : Stupid BastardCollapse )

Drabble 4 : The Grapevine
Characters : Byakuya, Gin
Words : 441
A/N : Amusement in slandering the Kuchiki dignity at the academy.
4 : The GrapevineCollapse )

on final fantasy pairings and such

on reno x rufus x reno

so upon realizing that kadaj x yazoo fics occur as often as chocobos trying to jump out of squall leonhart's figurative and literal tight ass *snickers*, reno x rufus was spotted pretty-fying itself at the edges of the FFVII fandom, unnoticed by most. now even before advent children came out i was already happily shipping the pairing, googling it in every possible way imaginable, and my renewed interest in FFVII sort of steered me to pry and poke at the fandom once again. it also made me re-evaluate why i liked it so much.

first reason why this pairing caught my eye was because 1) both of them looked HOT together. so sue me for being that shallow; it makes me happy seeing pretty boys getting it on. i mean, i'd rather read about rufus and reno getting down and dirty in one of the shinra penthouses any day than cid and barrett (ULTIMATE SHUDDER OF DOOM) even looking at each other in THAT way. the thought is enough to kill a few IQ points in my opinion.

second reason is that there is the ambiguity and spontaneity of their relationship with each other that makes it so interesting to read. there is no absolute seme or uke once you try to think about it. shall i illustrate? take rufus for example. everybody KNOWS he's such a repressed tight ass, and usually, that's enough to make anybody the bottom in a pairing. but you see, rufus is also the heir of the shinra legacy, and this entails that rufus' be taught to be a ruthless alpha male in the dog-eat-dog world of commercialism. reno on the other hand, is the annoying asshole that lives to piss rufus off. reno will probably let rufus dominate him on the odd occasion, but definitely not always because that would mean he's submitting to rufus and that is wrong because 1) reno doesn't submit to rules. rules equal authority. submission to rules equals submission to authority. that goes against reno's very personality and 2) him dominating rufus will probably annoy the blonde to a very great extent, ergo, more fun for him.

of course though i think they belong together doesn't mean that they're going to have a fine and dandy relationship. NO SIREE BOB, they'll probably fight like cats and dogs over the smallest things in the beginning before they settle, albeit grudgingly, into their routine of sex, introspection, work, sleep, eat and then more sex. most probably, they'll come very close to killing each other, but are stopped by some unbelievable occurence ordained by a fangirl goddess. yehp, totally works. and then they'll only realize that they love each other when they are torn apart. HAHAHAHAHAHA YES, i can totally see that happening.

on seifer x squall

i was 12 when i first played ffviii, and this was probably the first official yaoi pairing i've recognized of my own accord. after finishing the game twice and tiring of bashing rinoa to hell, i thought "why do i have to endure this insufferable pairing?!? tche, i'd rather squall and seifer get together than the crap they're trying to pass off as rinoa and squall's relationship." and then a lightbulb literally flickered on in my head and i then thought, "why the fuck not?"

at that time, i thought it was a total stroke of genius.

and as my belief was reaffirmed by the dozens of seifer x squall fics that i found on various websites and archives, the reason for them being perfect together was reaffirmed. they belonged with each other because they were EQUALS, ein no rivals to quote the japanese. they understood each other's little ticks and gaping personality flaws by the sheer amount of time they spent together. their aggression towards each other? i credit towards raging hormones and their defective method of expressing emotions. i mean HELLO, they were teenagers with traumatic pasts and emotional scars!!! it isn't going to be surprising that they have issues. and i am also of the opinion that squall only started mooning after the rinoa woman because he thought she was his first true love. don't get me wrong people, i believe in the first loves, but the probability of finding your most significant other at the first try is 1 over infinity. and the fact that she is such an airhead...


the one squick i have that i can't seem to get over is that if its a seifer x squall fic, seifer is always top. not that i can imagine squall being on top but its always seifer whose the strong one, seifer who has to go and save squall, seifer who has to redeem the commander from his demons and whatnot. i love seifer to bits and think the sun shines out of his ass, but the fandom's portrayal of his character ultimately turns me off for some reason. squall also sometimes comes across as such an uber whiny uke, and it just pisses me off to read about wimpy characters and their selfish little dramathons.

the other pairings i've tried to read:

seifer x irvine - hahahaha, this was total crack. i've found like, only 1 fic about this certain pairing and it wasn't anything special. but it would be interesting how irvine's carefree personality would mesh with seifer's devil may care attitude. doesn't really work though, for the lack of interaction between the two of them.

cloud x sephiroth - at first i had actually shipped this pairing, but after some time it became so obvious that cloud was going to be bottom 24/7 in this. a very big no no for me, since it's like, preordained. no surprise at all.

kadaj x yazoo - yumm! shm incest pairing! advent children is responsible for this one. it doesn't really make sense though cause kadaj's unstable and... young-ish character isn't one that i usually take too. it's just that they look good together.

vincent x yazoo - it is possible, but i've yet to thoroughly explore this side of the fandom.

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advent children zomg

i watched advent children yesterday and ZOMG CLOUD is SO HOT and KADAJ is the SMEX and YAZOO is totally being screwed by LOZ (though kadaj also seems like a likely candidate for yazoo buttsmex) and the WHOLE CAST was just uber COOL to DEATH.


i'm off to look for FFVII:AC fics. *smirks*

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